


Arthur and Sophie in the elevator / His point of view

by ArthurFlecksGirl



Category: Joker (2019)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:35:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25421746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArthurFlecksGirl/pseuds/ArthurFlecksGirl
Summary: My interpretation of the elevator scene from Arthur`s point of view
Relationships: Arthur Fleck/You
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Arthur and Sophie in the elevator / His point of view

Going up these stairs, entering the building , coming home to mum. It`s a chore. Every day it`s a fucking chore to do so. My whole body hurts. I should`t have kicked those trash cans so hard. I think I hurt my knee. But does it matter? As long as Penny doesn`t notice I am hurt again it should be fine. I don`t want her to worry about me. I don`t want her to see the bruises others did to me or the cigarette burns on my wrist which I did to myself. Since she committet me to Arkham months ago for hurting myself I am even more careful to hide it from her.   
Not that Arkham is some kind of hell for me.  
This is. This is hell. Opening that letter box to once again find nothing in it. Entering this elevator to get home to my mum, being asked if Thomas Wayne finally send a letter. Her voice when she calls me Happy. That`s my personal hell and it never ends. Every day is the same.  
I can`t get out of this dead city. Of this building which holds so many horrible memories for me. And most tragically- I can`t get out of my own skin. Out of this tired body. I cannot hide from my own twisted mind. Let`s be honest, I am a total mess.   
No matter how hard I try to fullfill my purpose in life. To make people laugh. I mostly fail. It`s all just a big joke and I am the fucking punshline no one understands.  
If only there was a way to escape from myself and all that I am.  
I tried to be myself. I tried to make them love me. But they can`t. They can`t love me. I am nothing but a freak to them. I need a new skin. A new identity. A new name. A new face. To start all over again. No more Arthur Fleck.   
I enter the elevator. My body feels like carrying the weight of the whole city on this small shoulders. I push that elevator button 5 times to make sure it works. It never works if I push it once. The dim, greenish light from the ceiling is shining upon me. But I can barely see it. My eyes are focused on the dirty ground.   
There should be spotlights. That´s where I should stand. In the shiney spotlghts of the Murray Franklin show. Not here. Not in this building. Thats not where I was meant to be at all.   
Just as the elevator door is about to close a voice caughts my attention. "Wait, wait, wait, wait." It`s her voice. I react immediately and look up. My foot moves towards the door to stop it. I`m a romantic at heart. That move feels like a dacing step. My body feels different within a second. I want her to know that I´m a gentleman.   
Sophie thanks me as she enters the small room with her little dauhter. her Thank you sounds kinda unpersonal but it`s better than nothing. To me it`s a lot to be honest. people bareley thank me for being nice to them. I really hope she noticed that I loved opening that door for her.   
I push the elevator button again. Just once. Because I feel like I am lucky right now. So once will do it as well.  
I take a quick look at her as she passes me. It all goes so fast. Too fast. I wish I could slow it down right now. To have more time with her. To let her know. But I can`t.  
The door closes. Pushing that button once was enough. I knew it. I just knew it. Maybe I get lucky today. Maybe Sophie will talk to me. Or look at me. Or both. I really wish for both.   
I think of a way to talk to her. It`s impossible. I am way too scared to laugh at her face. My body freezes and I`m just standing there, doing nothing.  
I feel Gigi`s eyes on me. She kinda hides in the corner, looking at me like she is scared of me. This hurts. How would any kid be scared of me? I love kids and I would love to tell her some jokes. I bet she has a beautiful smile. I mean, it`s Sophies daughter after all, right? I wish I had my magic wand with me to cheer her up. But I got nothing but a pack of cigarettes and an empty purse. I lose, once again.  
I caught myself looking down. My eyes are almost closed. I just can`t look at Sophie. I am too shamed of my fantasies about her. If only she knew....  
What would she think of me, knowing that every night when I go to bed, I think about kissing her soft lips, feeling her loving arms around me, keeping me warm? Or me just grabbing her and kiss her passionately until she is out of breath? Making out. I think about her a lot. I think about her naked skin next to mine while I`m hinding under the blankets of my worn out couch, touching myself while my mother is aslpeep. I wish I had a photograph of her. I would put it under my pillow to dream of her at night.   
But she doesn`t know that I am in love with her ever since she moved here. Or maybe she does? Maybe she is just playing games? Is there any chance she fantasies about me,too? I imagin her thinking of me making love to her before she falls asleep. I hope she knows how gentle I can be. I hope she sees me as I am.  
My eyes open for a brief moment, just to look down again as I realize she is whispering something to her daughter. I can feel her looking at me. Somehow it makes me feel uncomfortable. Shouldn`t I feel good? She is standing right next to me! The woman of my dreams. And all I do is going on the inside. Like I always so.   
And now it happens.  
The elevator gets stucked.  
Coincidence? Or is it destiny?  
Me and her stuck in the elevator together.  
How ironic.  
I dreamed about this so many times.  
I played it all through in my head.  
The elevator gets stucked and I am looking at her, realziing she was staring at me all the time. And I just grab her face and kiss her. She wouldn`t notice that it`s my very first kiss because I am natural talent. She couldnt get enogh of me and we end up at her place.  
Sophie looks annoyed as we stop. Her daughter is giggeling.  
"This building is so aweful isn`t it?" she is finally talking so I dare to look at her face for the first time. She is wearing a red jacket over a blue shirt. I like it. The red and blue. Especially the red jacket. It`s my fave color. Maybe I should think about getting a red jacket,too. I think she would like it.   
For a moment I get lost in her big, brown eyes. Her beauty is overwhelming.  
She thinks this building sucks,too. Maybe we are not that different. She ended up where I grew up. Maybe it´s all meant to be in the end.  
"This building is so aweful, right mommy?" Gigi looks at her mum. She also doesnt like it here. I see a connectio between us. We would make a great family. I would love to be a good daddy for her little daughter. I bet she would love a dad that is a party clown. Who wouldn`t?  
Family.  
This would be a dream come true.  
We could share so much love.  
"Yes we can hear you, Gigi. " Sophie says. You can tell that this is all to much for her. Beng alone with her daughter. She needs a man on her side. Someone who takes care of her and Gigi.  
I am right here. I hope you notice.  
"It`s soooo aweful, mommy".  
Sophie takes her left hand and imitates a gunshot to her head. She even does the noise.  
I smile.   
I guess thats her way of telling me we are not that different after all.  
She understands me more than I know.  
I love her for doing this.  
It makes me feel even closer to her.  
I finally look her in the eyes. A smirk is crossing my face.  
She hates it here as much as I do. She is tired of life,too. Maybe we could just run away together.   
The ring of the doorbell interrups my thoughts. I haven`t even noticed that the elevator moved again.  
"Good night" Sophie looks at me and smiles.  
She smiles and wishes me a good night.   
Oh, I will definitely have some nice dreams of you tonight, my love.  
I can`t belive how lucky I got today.  
They both leave the elevator before me and Gigi goes "This building is so aweful, isnt it?". There is a man shouting and a baby crying in the background. Damn right it is precious, little girl.  
"Mmmmhhh hmmmm" Sophie agrees.  
I walk into the other direction. M apartment is down the hall from hers.  
But I gotta do something. I can`t just leave and go home. I have to let her know that I got her sign.  
I can`t let this chance pass.  
She has to know that I felt the connection.  
I decide to turn around "Hey!"  
She turns around, looking kinda surprised that I said something. I never say something.  
I mirror her head to gun gesture. Just much quicker than she did. I point my fingers to my head and imitate a gun shot while I let my head fall to the side.   
See? I also feel like dying.   
I understand you, Sophie.  
I really do.  
I look at her and wait for hear reaction. My head still leaned towards my shoulder like I just shot myself.  
I can finally look her in the eyes now.  
She smiles. Its`s a strange smile. Kinda reminds me of when I am trying to smile but I dont feel like it. She really knows what I am going through.  
Sophie turns around and unlocks her door. She gives me one last look before she gets into her apartment.  
I guess we just flirted with each other. Thats was good. real good. A smirk is crossing my lips as I lift an eyerow and turn around to get into my apartment.  
Some days, Sophie we will be untited.   
You will laugh at my jokes and I will hold you in my loving arms forever.


End file.
